Yeah. It's Saturday again. I suppose to be happy for the weekend~ but somehow i could not find anything to hope for during these 2 days. So...end up moodless. Haha. Thanks to my wonderful tendon, i visited the physiotherapist on Wednesday. Acupuncture needles on my calf and tendon. It is painful. Luckily i did not cry, that will be so embarrassing...with other UCC students outside looking at this weird Asian girls hehe.
Walked out from the student health centre. With my cacated foot, i walked alone down the street to go to my class. Yeap, it did not feel good walking alone with that painful foot when the cold wind keep slapping your face. At that moment, i realised that i am officially alone in this country. Alone as in, when you encounter any problem, you have to solve it yourself and face it yourself. It is not easy to face everything alone as i used to have really good and close friends in INTEC. Astynnia, Cindy and Tulip~They will always be there whenever i need help or company. Maybe it's because our character can somehow complement each other and we have the same interests, we always go out together, eat together, watch videos together and help each other. We should get the 'Best House Award' in akasia. Haha. Now they are all gone, all in Dublin and i'm alone here. Of course i feel sad~ but what can i do?
People always say...make new friends. Yeah of course i like to make new friends! I like it when a big group of friends can go city centre to try out new food and explore new places but in reality it is not easy to achieve. Everyone has their own thing to do, they are busy and so you cannot expect them to be there for you whenever you need them. And...you do have to realise that, when it's time to have fun you will have lots of friends; when you need help everyone just seem to disappear. Mind you~ they don't reply messages.
Eating alone, walking alone, go to gym alone, study alone,settle things alone~ these are all so common here.
So..conclusion is, just do it yourself. All by yourself,if possible.
Sometimes i will just feel like crying whenever i thought of that heartless guy. After a minute i will just slap my face and tell myself that it is not worth it to shed your tears for him. Since he ask you to leave, so what's the point of staying? Betraying this relationship and keep popping out after that to ask what i am doing everyday is just ridiculous. Perhaps he just does not know...how much this hurts me~ Somehow, he makes me feel that true love does not exist...and relationships are just bullshit. Yeah~ i am so fed up with these kind of things. So troublesome and it is a total waste of time. Work hard for yourself and support yourself in the future. One day, i will be a better person and you will regret for ditching me. One day, I will just walk pass you without my heart aching. One day, i will just totally forget about you...Live without him and stay happy.
I'm learning to be strong right now~whenever you feel weak, look at the limitless sky and tell yourself that nothing is impossible. You can do it!!! Cheers! :D
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